When I applied for the job I have now, I was pretty nervous. I got the application and filled it out and took it to the secretary. I don’t remember exactly how the exchange went, but I got my words all jumbled up and just made it awkward. As I left, feeling like I’d blown it again, this thought came into my head: “They’re not out to get you.” It kindof made me laugh, because it really surprised me that I could actually think they were out to get me, and then I realized how silly that was.

At the BYU student women’s conference a few weeks ago, one of the presenters said that it is good to remember when you are giving presentations (the class was on public speaking) that your audience wants you to succeed. She said something to the effect that people won’t be hoping to see you trip on your way up, or that you will get your words all jumbled, or that you’ll have a coughing fit, or whatever.

Since then I have really noticed that this is true. I do want to see people succeed.

A few weeks ago I saw a little example of this. Our hall was having a “smoothie party”. There were only a couple of guys that came over, and there were maybe ten girls. After a little while a guy from our ward came over and was looking around at the different smoothie ingredients and everything. We were trying to be friendly and stuff, but after a little while of him looking like he felt really awkward, he left. It made me feel kindof sad for him. How many times that kind of thing has happened to me.. Where I feel conscpicuous, and out of place. And I’m just thinking about getting out as fast as I can… But seeing him I really wanted him to succeed, I didn’t want him to feel bad and leave, I wanted him to stay and have some smoothies with us.

The Lord certainly does want us to suceed and he is so patient with us, too. Lately I’ve been thinking about this. A parent is overjoyed to see their little baby take thier first feeble steps. They are not frustrated or upset because they can’t walk a long ways yet. Sometimes I forget that and feel like I have to be perfect now, when really what matters is that I am still trying and growing.

I feel like I’ve rambled–and it seems kindof jumbly, but oh well….
I guess you guys aren’t out to get me either, huh?
Silly me ;)